All can TRY to renounce being a follower of Christ.... But Christ has better plans for you, for us all... as long as we wake up and grip to them!!
My friend Kelly Crabb has been quite the fighter, the defender for Jesus!! Very much so on fire for His Truth! And that always intrigued me to watch one fight for Jesus-so much the way Paul did!! Very loud in words, very vocal, very open-not afraid. I like that. We all have different ways of converting, sharing His Gospel. And many, especially men cling more to the "don't be dumb, in your face mode..." A lot of women would be hurt from something like that, and turn whether in tears or anger, but turn and not listen to that type of announcement about Jesus. Me personally, I was the "tough" chick, that when it was "thrown" in my face in that way-I threw back all my ways I wouldn't turn to "his god..." "my god" was better. I really didn't have a god... I just went down the list of what "my heaven" was-and no where in it did it include this "Jesus" person that my ex told me he loved more than me. He was very upfront. But after all I had to go thru to find Jesus-I look at people like Kelly, like my ex, and I see the reality in it. I see the clock ticking. I saw all I had to go thru-almost having to actually overdose so much and near death to finally call upon Christ!! To change my personal ways. Kelly has gone thru a lot in life. And this is just a bit of it. I have been blessed to hear more and be astonished about what he has lived thru, who he has become-all thru our Maker, our Redeemer, our Best Friend-Jesus Christ. But also, all in Kelly's will to pick himself up from hard times and give those to Jesus-trust HIM and accept HIM thru everything he had gone thru, was going thru, was yet to go thru--but wanted Jesus there thru it all...good and bad. As sermons have taught... we are not to partially "keep" Jesus...and just place Him in our trunk... or on a better day with Christ, maybe give Him the back seat. Or when we really feel like we are sooooo Christ-Like, we open the "passenger" door for Him....no, that isn't how it goes. We are to leave our car running, climb quickly into the passenger seat allowing our Leader, our Lord Jesus Christ to show us where we will be heading WITH HIM. He can also have every and any radio station HE WANTS! He is our EVERYTHING. Kelly has a lot of this in him. Very kind-hearted soul. Speaks truth that may bug some people to delete, which I feel, if you do that, there is something wrong with your walk. We all will have "differences." But to disconnect from someone where the core of everyone's belief is Christ-it is basically disconnecting from Christ. He asked us not to quarrel over differences ... love each other thru everything... help each other gently if one looks like they are walking a bit crooked. But today-everyone just disconnects. Kelly speaks plain truth on Facebook out of love-and people disconnect. I am here to say-to you Kelly, your fight for Christ will be well rewarded in Heaven. And always keep our friendship! I pray for all who get angry-if you get angry, then there is something wrong with your defense. When one knows truth and can stay calm thru the battle, that is because it is true. That is why Jesus could sleep thru storms. If we carry His truth, we should be able to sleep thru storms-bi pass anxiety. Don't you think. We have amazing Jesus on our side. Let's make sure we keep walking across the water, without doubt.... thru God, anything is possible. Kelly, you know that well.
Bless you!!
Testimony by Kelly Crabb....
I tried to renounce being a Christian:
My testimony
In 1983 we had a little girl born with Beckwith–Wiedemann Syndrome. On the day that she was born I was so angry and upset with God that I tried to renounce being a Christian.
I had gone home from the hospital, walking in the door, I saw a little soup skillet laying in the floor. I went for a field goal, hoping that I would break my toes, it would have hurt less than the pain that I was feeling.
In my mind the thought came, "If this is what it is to be a Christian, why don't you tell God to get the hell out of your life? You just want to be happy like everyone else." I said, good idea, "God, if this is what it is to be a Christian, I want no part of You, get away from me." Then the thought came,"Tell Jesus too," so I said,"Lord if this is what it is to be a Christian, I am sorry that I ever met You, get out of my life." Then, I heard stuttering in my mind, which I thought odd, of course, who stutters in their mind? "Go ahead, T, T, Tell, number 3 too." Immediately in my mind I saw a beam of light, like a floodlight coming through the clouds.
Just when I thought that it was my imagination, I was lifted up into the air, though still in my living room on the first floor, and saw the light hit the rooftop. Immediately I was back in my living-room, and in my mind I saw the light hit the floor to my right side. Immediately I couldn't cry anymore.
I yelled, "Leave me alone, have you seen my baby?" He said,"Kelly, I can't allow you to do that. Being 22, I said,"Oh yea, watch this." I could not speak a word. I opened my mouth, but could not speak at all.
I said,"If you wont let me say it out loud, I am going to say it in my mind."
He said,"Kelly, I can't allow you to do that, it is the only thing that I can't forgive you for." I didn't care, I was furious. So I tried again, and again, He would not let me put any words together at all.
He said,"Put your daughter in my hands." Internally, I said,"Put her in your hands, you are God, you could have had her born normal." He said,"Can you heal her, can you take her home?" Funny, I was still calling Him Lord. I said,"No Lord."
A ticker-tape ran through my mind with part A and part B of two verses,"Cast all your cares upon Him that careth for you, and the peace which surpasses all understanding will keep your heart and mind in Christ."
I had perfect peace for the whole seven and a half months that Jessica lived. Even when they called us 4-5 times needing a verbal approval over the phone for emergency surgery to save her life, I had a totally uncanny peace, that let me know that everything would be all right.
He gave me the ability to trust Him, even when everyone around me was crying and so upset. They would even ask me if I even cared about my own daughter. I said,"Yes, of course, but God has let me know that everything will be all right. I don't know how, but I just know that it will be okay."
I never worried or shed a tear from that moment in my living room until I held my daughters body in my arms. Her little body was still warm. When I asked the nurse why she was still warm after dying 4 hours ago, she told me that her nurse had just laid her down a few minutes ago. She had been holding her in her arms for 4 hours after her death.
Yet, you will see her in Heaven, face to face Kelly - you and your beautiful wife! Imagine that!!! Blessings to you!!!
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